A Letter to Lita on Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day

Dear Lita,

When I first met you, I thought you were annoying because you wouldn't let me pet any of your brothers or sisters. It makes me laugh now because the last word I'd use to describe you is annoying. You were a lot of things - loving, gentle, opinionated, chatty (with the "bad man"), intelligent, sweet, affectionate, a little bossy/demanding (when it came to food!), stubborn, strong, a fighter.....but you were definitely not annoying!

I think you knew before I did that we'd end up together and just wanted to make sure that I knew that you had chosen me as your forever human. What a privilege that was!

Shortly after we moved halfway across the country, you quickly became my best friend. We'd eat together, study together, listen to those horribly boring social work textbooks together, watch television together, and sleep together.  Whenever I was home, you were my little shadow. I felt so loved and special.




Over the 14 yeas we spent together, our bond only grew stronger. You were such an integral part of my life that I simply could not imagine life without you here. You, me, and Carmine were a family for so long. It's still odd not to have you here physically.

I'm so glad that you picked me to be your human. I always did my best to give you the best possible life - good food, comfortable beds and blankets, toys you loved, and of course all of my heart. You deserved it. In return, you gave me unconditional love - a type of love I'd never really understood before you came into my life. Thank you for teaching me what love is really all about.

When you got so sick in the Fall of 2017, I was terrified you were going to leave us. You were so sick. I kept waiting for you to tell me you'd had enough, but you never did. So I kept fighting for  you and with you. We took a huge risk in giving you 13 Convenia injections to treat the pneumonia you had. Somehow, you defied everyone's expectations, defied death, and got well. It was a miracle.

You were with us for nine more months.

The only regret I have is the way that you died. I'm so sorry it wasn't the peaceful passing I'd wanted to give you. I'm sorry your last minutes were spent in fear. I hated seeing you like that and felt so incredibly helpless because there was nothing I could do to help you. Please forgive me for those last moments, Lita. You know that is never how I wanted you to spend your last moments with us.

I'm sorry that you had to suffer the neurotoxicity from the Convenia. It is a cruel irony that the very treatment that saved your life, took it nine months later.

You know that I would have never kept you going if you had told me you were done and if there wasn't a really good chance you'd recover from the neurotoxicity. The "bad man" loved you so much. He did a lot of reading and found that most kitties recovered from Convenia neurotoxicity, and even our vet thought you would pull through. But that didn't happen.

I still have some guilt over agreeing to give you that last Convenia injection because had I not agreed to it, you might have lived longer.

I think of you everyday and wish I could have one of your hugs or hear you tweeting again. I wish you were here to watch Meerkats or to demand a snack.

I have no doubt that you had a paw in bringing Tylan here. He is like you in some ways - he is absolutely obsessed with food, he is very intelligent, and he follows me around, supervising my daily activities.

I'm sure you are laughing at how much Tylan bothers Carmine since he always used to bug you!

Tylan will never replace you in my heart. He is a good mancat, and I am glad that you sent him here to have a good life.

Please tell Jewel that she has not been forgotten! I think of her everyday, too. I miss you and love you both so much!

Love,
The Mom

Jewel 

July, 1998 - August 28, 2014

Lita

July, 2003 - September 12, 2018